In the Mirror

January 13th, 2019

Every time I see a mirror
I see my self a little clearer
But a little of his insanity
Finds the route back into me

I’ve been the problem for far too long
trying to be the best instead of getting along.
I hold it over people’s heads
that I got given more than them.

Get rid of it all; let it fall:

  • The pall that warps my words into worthless forms —
  • The first hurt that makes me fuck instead of making Love —
  • The lie that said getting high was better than wri-
  • ting or breathing mindfully —
  • the later that poisoned my now.

I have become an asshole
but let me be one, if you would,
let me recycle something good

I am one channel of the fuck-lusting stereo-
type I can never use again, bro;
I have pursued every sin, though
I have been warned against it;
I persist despite the wishes I insist exist
Take the shame away, the want for fame away;
It’s toxic, obnoxious, to me & others
Making jealous my sisters & brothers.

I am still more anti- than Christ;
I know judgement persists so
my only hope
is this: grace —
Let me see my face
and hate
it and love it and let it go forever
and I will see someone different in the mirror

when I need to look & maybe they will forgive
the last one to vis

it, the has-been who wish-ed this

I have become an asshole
but let me be one, if you would,
let me recycle something good

This can be your salvation —
The earth belching from intoxication
and the millenia of rebelliousness
vomited forth as hellish shit
and every twisted inconsistency is hit
let go or go with it.
The braid is unbound / now.
This can still be your salvation you who have tested the grace of God
You are being reborn in-
to the pain you bore
This can be your salvation: choose to endure while Endurance is near
DO NO VIOLENCE and let yourself die
Watch the winging birds & share their flight
Escape in the bubbles of fate’s last gasp rising years later to the placid light